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When we can process how we feel,

we can think more clearly about how to act.

019: The Fragile Fluttering of Hope

I am a lone woman
I have been hopeful of another future, not once but twice
Once standing up for life in my twenties
Seeking love to save us from annihilation
Our ideology a stranglehold on an already precarious life
But I decided

  • Mission aborted; I couldn’t risk the disappointment
  • but I remember that fluttering of hope

And life was lived in stasis
Devastating events unfolding unexamined

A decade later still seeking refuge from my fears
A wounded person seeking love for a wounded planet
The shift in perception was unplanned
but not unbidden

For weeks I kept quiet and held it to me and wanted this hope to thrive
But a wounded relationship between the earth and her wounded people held no fertile ground to bring a new era to fruition and again I decided

  • Mission aborted; I couldn’t risk the disappointment,
  • but I remember that fluttering of hope

A decade later, as a more steadfast person, I craved social change, but try as I might
Nature and time were against us now and optimism would not so easily take hold
And I remember the loss

Now in my sixth decade
I decided

  • I am a woman among many

We hold our lives as our own and know we can bring love to life
We can nurture seeds and help them grow
We can understand the link between earth and air and water and light
We can understand the need to connect between brown and black and white and red
And that a circle of life includes death and death brings life
And that perception can be an awareness of what holds us still
and of what needs to be let go

  • to be a new era,
  • to restore the balance of power